From My Bookshelf: This Year’s Reads
Hi! If this is your first time here — welcome! I’m honored that you’re taking the time to read my work! This post differs from my usual ones, which typically center around topics like ED recovery, living with chronic pain, queerness, and other mental health-adjacent themes. However, I believe that there is a ton of value to be found in distractions — meaning, especially in the context of ED recovery and living with a chronic health issue, it’s become necessary for me to purposefully invest time and mental energy in hobbies and things not related to recovery; if I don’t, I run the risk of letting my food and body image hangups become truly all-consuming. Additionally, I’m always eager to hear what books others are recommending, and I love a good book list.
All that to say, I think it can be productive for me to occasionally shelve the heavy stuff and pull a lighter, just-for-fun book down instead. (Sorry, I know that was a bad pun… I couldn’t resist?).
Lastly, this past week has been one of the most emotionally intense and overwhelming of my life. While I’m in the midst of processing things — I’m a wreck, transparently — it’s been helpful for me to have a more lighthearted post to work on whenever I’ve needed a break.
I’ll be honest… This hasn’t been my favorite year when it comes to books. I feel like I read a lot of 2- and 3-star books, and very few 5-star ones. Interestingly, however, a few of the 5-star books I picked up for the first time this year are some of the best books I’ve ever read. Two of them, as you’ll soon see, have even made my ‘Favorite Books Ever’ list (which I include at the end of this newsletter). So, this year was kind of a mixed bag on my end — I’d be delighted to hear how you felt about the books you read this year! If you’ve loved or hated any of the ones that I discuss below, please feel free to leave a comment or DM me. I’d love to know your thoughts, as well as any book recommendations YOU might be willing to share!
Quick disclaimers (if you’ve been here for a bit, you know that I can’t help myself with the disclaimers): What follows is entirely based on my personal opinions and preferences — one of the things I love most about books is how subjective they are. It’s fascinating to me when I love a book, and then read someone else’s review about how they despised it, and vice versa. Also, I only discuss fiction books in this post; I have a separate list of non-fiction, historical, and ‘academic’ books that I’m more than happy to share if anyone is interested.
Without further adieu… Here are the five best (fiction) books that I read this year:
#1: The God of the Woods by Liz Moore
This is — hands down — one of my favorite books of all time. It was undoubtedly the most propulsive book I’ve ever read; I truly didn’t want to put it down (which is, honestly, an exceedingly rare sensation for me). I wasn’t sure whether I would like this: I knew there was a ton of buzz around it, but I’d also heard that the numerous narrators were a hang-up for some readers, who found the plot difficult to get into and somewhat hard to follow as perspectives continually switched. I understand this point, but as someone who typically enjoys multiple perspectives in novels, I actually loved this component. The book kept me on my toes until the very end, and I found the character development tremendously compelling. My only (tiny) qualm was the last 10% or so; I found the conclusion somewhat anti-climactic and less “thrilling” than I had expected. Overall, though, I can’t stress enough how much I thoroughly enjoyed this book. So much so, in fact, that I think I experienced my first-ever book “hangover?” I had a very difficult time finding my next read after finishing The God of the Woods, because it set the bar so high.
#2: The Push by Ashley Audrain
Oof. This book is certainly not for everyone, so I’d strongly recommend checking the content warnings before diving in. As a woman who is child-free by choice, and someone diagnosed with CPTSD due to difficult family-of-origin dynamics, this book hit me quite hard. I wouldn’t personally consider The Push a “thriller” — I feel like “psychological family drama” is a more fitting description. The first 60% of the book felt almost memoir-ish to me, while the rest leaned more novel-ish. Like The God of the Woods, I found this both gripping and addictive. While the controversial ending didn’t surprise me at all, I actually thought it was perfect.
#3: The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides
I’ll admit it — the ending completely got me. I was genuinely shocked. I do often enjoy thrillers, especially when I’m struggling to get into a reading routine, but I’m slightly wary of thrillers that focus on therapists, psychiatrists, and mental health themes in general (mainly because, frankly, they sometimes hit a little too close to home, if you know what I mean?). But The Silent Patient was simply too captivating, and I needed to know how it ended. I feel like I’m (somewhat) decent at discerning twisty endings, but not this time… I’m especially curious to hear your thoughts on this one!
#4: Come and Get It by Kiley Reid
I liked Reid’s debut novel, Such a Fun Age, so I was interested in reading Come and Get It, but I didn’t anticipate loving it as much as I did. I’m personally a fan of books that center around academia, which this one does. Additionally, the book takes place in both Chicago and at the University of Arkansas, which was really fascinating — and frankly bizarre — to me, since I went to undergrad at Uark and lived in Chicago for several years as well. What I found most compelling about this novel was Reid’s portrayal of imbalanced power dynamics, both within the context of academia and within romantic relationships (specifically those with an age gap). I appreciated Reid’s nuanced attention to the experience of Black, queer women living in the South, as well as how she touched on so many important themes like class, race, ethics, power, sex, and money. Overall, this is a perfect get-out-of-a-reading-slump book!
#5: Bye, Baby by Carola Lovering
I’m so happy for Lovering and all the well-deserved success she has experienced these past several years. However, I’ll be honest: I do feel the smallest touch of the ‘I knew her before she was famous’ syndrome over her and her books, since I’ve been a huge fan from early on (I know this is silly and irrational!). I read Tell Me Lies immediately after it was released in June 2018, and I thought it was so darkly relatable, compelling, and raw. Since her debut novel, I’ve eagerly awaited each of Lovering’s subsequent publications, and I’ve loved all of them. BUT, Bye, Baby was — bar none — my favorite book of hers yet! I think this was the first novel where Lovering explores friendships and the myriad of complicated dynamics that accompany long-term friendships; her previous books have focused much more on romantic relationships. There were just so many aspects of this book that felt deeply resonant to me, and I saw parts of myself and my previous experiences with certain childhood and high school friends depicted on the pages. Lovering’s Instagram account is also my go-to when I need new book suggestions.
Honorable Mentions:
Real Americans by Rachel Khong
None of This Is True by Lisa Jewell
I Hope This Finds You Well by Natalie Sue
The Glass Castle: A Memoir by Jeannette Walls
Firefly Lane by Kristin Hannah
Books that I wanted to love… But ultimately weren’t my favorites:
Blue Sisters by Coco Mellor
The Pairing by Casey McQuiston
The Plot by Jean Hanff Korelitz
The Rachel Incident by Caroline O’Donoghue
The Guest by Emma Cline
Funny Story by Emily Henry
To be clear, I think all of these authors are fantastic and that these books are very well-written. The praise that each of these has received is undoubtedly wholly deserved, however, they just didn’t end up being my personal favorites… Do you disagree?
(Some of? Most of?) My Favorite Fiction Books Ever:
Yerba Buena by Nina Lacour
These Impossible Things by Salma El-Wardany
Free Food for Millionaires by Min Jin Lee
Maame by Jessica George
Mad Honey by Jennifer Finney Boylan & Jodi Picoult
City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert
Mrs. Everything by Jennifer Weiner
A Hundred Other Girls by Iman Hariri-Kia
The Mothers by Britt Bennet
Friends and Strangers by J. Courtney Sullivan
Call Me By Your Name by André Aciman
Other People We Married by Emma Straub
Wild Game: My Mother, Her Secret, and Me by Adrienne Broduer
My Last Innocent Year by Daisy Alpert Florin
The Others’ Gold by Elizabeth Ames
The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas
Good Company by Cynthia D’Aprix
Adelaide by Genevieve Wheeler
God of the Woods by Liz Moore
The Push by Ashley Audrain
On my TBR:
Colored Television by Danzy Senna
Priestdaddy by Patricia Lockwood
The Maid by Nina Prose
Happiness Falls by Angie Kim
My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell
Sandwich by Catherine Newman
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If you feel like you’re barely making it right now, I’m right there with you. Sending love and light to all.